Review of “Misteri Jalan Lama”

Sebelum teman menulis lebih lanjut, dan kepada sesapa yang tak tengok wayang nih lagi, sila tengok trailer cerita Misteri Jalan Lama kat bawah nih.

Fuhhh, memang gempak teman nengok trailer filem nih! Kalau baca sinopsis dia (sini), lagi canggih der! Jika nak diukurkan cerita nih kalau setakat tengok trailer ajer, memang nampak canggih. Ada macam cerita hantu pun ada, cerita purba pun ada, cerita magik pun ada, ala2 Lord of the Rings pun ada. Ish3x!

Tapi apekeheinya?

Teman mengaku yang teman tertarik nak tengok filem nih bila teman first time tengok teaser filem Afdlin Shauki nih masa teman tengok cerita Tintin. Memang tengok macam filem mahei (mahal) dan macam2 ada: teknik cinematography yang menarik, penggunaan filter yang kreatif, camera angle yang kadang2 senggama minda, dan penata bunyi yang menggerunkan.

Tapi setakat itu ajer la keistimewaan filem ini.

Poster nampak canggih jugak!

Pada fikiran teman, konsep asal filem ini adalah menarik, walaupun tak original sebab ada ambik idea daripada beberapa filem Hollywood lain. Tapi itu setakat konsep aje la, sebabnya bila ditukarkan konsep kepada realiti, langsung tak menjadi. Filem jadi kucar-kacir dan langsung tidak menarik minat penonton untuk menonton (teman sendiri udah menguap banyak kali dalam 15 minit pertama filem ini).

Satu cubaan yang berani dari Afdlin Shauki (berbanding dengan baget yang tak seberapa), tapi agak2 la sket brader. Takkan cerita macam ini lu mau tunjuk sama orang? Takde kualiti, brader! Para pelakon pun macam kaku semacam (termasuk la sapa2 yang dah pernah menang awards tuh). Jalan cerita entah haper2, walaupun teman ada nampak cubaan Afdlin untuk menampilkan kelainan. Tapi Raja Bunian pakai baju besi dan berperang dalam hutan?

Poster dengan grafik yang berbeza

Filem ini ternyata filem Afdlin Shauki yang terburuk sekali, selepas berjaya sebagai sutradara dalam filem2 seperti Papadom, Los dan Faun, Buli Balik, Baik Punya Cilok dan Buli. Teman tau yang Afdlin beroperasi dengan satu baget yang rendah (sebab tuh filem lambat keluar kan?) dan menghadapi beberapa konflik sepanjang pembikinan filem ini (termasuklah Que Haidar yang dah heboh kata nak bersara dari filem sejak tahun lepas, tup3x ada plak keluar filem lagi tahun ini. Nampak sangat ini filem dah lama buat!).

Tapi ini bukan alasan untuk mempersembahkan satu filem yang tidak berkualiti, kan? Teman sebagai penonton, ingin menghiburkan hati bila menonton wayang. Tapi kalau filem pun tak best, udah tentu teman tak terhibur! Lagipun, teman bukannya tengok free, teman bayar untuk masuk panggung, der! Kalau macam ini la korang buat filem, baik la teman duduk rumah ajer layan citer P. Ramlee.

Best to avoid this movie altogether! Tunggu ajer dia keluor Astro First ke (kalau nak tengok la), haper ke. Pastu download ajer memana. Setel.

Untuk meredakan sedikit hati yang tengah bengang nih, nikmati lah video klip lagu tema filem Misteri Jalan Lama nih.

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P1 is getting vulgar with ‘Potong Stim”?

Is it just me or is anyone even feel offended with P1’s new advertisement?

In my opinion, P1 4G Malaysia (formerly P1 WiMax) is getting more ‘pornier’ (is there such a word?) with their advertisement lately. They have tried several other methods (like ‘Potong’ and the Kamasutra ad) to attract new users to their service, which I think is lame.

Now they come up with an even lamier (again, is there such word?) way to try and get the attention of new subscribers. Instead of improving their service, they have gone to porn to get new business.

It's Potong Stim this time

Their new advert tagline now is “Potong Stim“, which is loosely translated as “cut the steam”. They even trademarked the wording (see photo above)!

If I’m not mistaken, I’ve used the word ‘Potong Stim” when I was in secondary school, and it usually means “kacau daun” or interrupt/disturb. The sentence word start something like, “Ko nih memang potong stim la!” (you like to interrupt/disturb!). But in reality, ‘stim’ is basically referred to “sexual heat” or the feeling when you in sexual mood. So, shouldn’t the “Potong Stim” refers to that?

Well, “potong stim” can also means anticlimax.

Read this and tell me what's the message

And by publishing the advert above, supports my theory that P1 is using sex to sell. Yeah, it’s true that sex sells, but you’re are currently selling broadband services, innit?

And why isn’t the body that govern the advertising in Malaysia stopped this kind of ‘sexy’ advertisement? Do you want your children to read the advert and get the wrong message? Do ya?

Way to go, P1! Next time, why don’t you put a naked pornstar in your advert? I’ll be happy.

Assholes!

Your eggs or mine?

Thanks to @maczainul for the pic

As translated by Google Translate, “Please weigh your eggs”.

So, what are you waiting for?

Proton’s Power Windows

Power windows? What power windows?

I read the news yesterday where it stated that Proton is now offering a 10-year warranty (or 250,000km, whichever first) for its fleet of Proton cars. Wanna know what I think of it? I say, FARK YOU PROTON!

For your information, I have bought three Proton cars in the last 13 years, and all of them have the so-called “power windows problem”. But why the fark Proton offering the warranty now? Why not 13 years ago, or since the first Proton Saga back in 1985?

In Malaysia, Proton is well-known as a government-protected company, producing not-so-cheap cars, no technical no-how whatsoever, and selling cars with faulty power windows.

Recently, the MD of Proton (Datuk Seri Syed Zainal Abidin) said, “We want to encourage our customers to use their power windows as hard as they want and if there is a problem, Proton will fix it free of charge for them”.

Is this the way a so-called global car manufacturer works? After 26 years, they’re finally gonna fix the power windows?

Nice job, Proton. Nice job.

What can we learned from this?

The event above happened during last Ramadhan (last month). A group of  eight “Mat Rempits” (five in the shop and another three stood standby outside) stormed into a Mamak restaurant in Section 15 Shah Alam and grabbed laptops, money and the cash register from the shop. It happened at 4.00am, while the patrons are having their “sahur“.

This is a very rare event, and hardly heard of. But now, the “grab and run” style of robbery has become very common. The question is, what can we learn from this?

To avoid all these, we should:

• Never go out so late at night (early morning is definitely a no-no);
• Have your late supper (or “sahur” in Ramadhan) at home;
• Never, ever bring your laptops/tablets/smartphones out with you to the restaurants;
• Don’t surf the internet at open areas. Mamak’s restaurants are considered open areas as they lack the proper security and the venue is very open to public (Starbucks in the other hand is considered closed areas, as they have walls and proper doors. And most of Starbucks are located within the vicinity of shopping complexes);

But from the video and what had happened, it makes me wonder whether the Mamak’s restaurant (or any other Mamak’s) is safe for us or not. Please consider my arguments:

• Security camera – is it used to monitor the security of patrons or to monitor the customers who wouldn’t pay?
• Shop assistants – are they doing enough, other than run away earlier than the patrons?
• Opening hours – should the authorities limit the opening time of restaurants?
• Insurance – do the patrons received coverage against theft or other crimes INSIDE the restaurants?
• Responsibility – since the restaurant is offering its services to customers, should they be responsible to what ever happened IN the restaurant?

I think the proprietor of the restaurant is not doing his/her part of the bargain. The owner should be responsible to all his/her paying customers and to ensure their safety. Not to run away and left the customers alone in the restaurant, when the robbers came. It looks like that your main (and only) priority is to get money from your patrons, and nothing else. After you get your millions from us, is that the best you can do? Irresponsible!